The Blessings

Since I learned I would be embarking on this cancer journey I decided I would use the experience to look for the blessings and reap some lasting benefit from the lessons learned.

I am about six weeks in and have had numerous new experiences, including a week in the hospital with dehydration and kidney failure, and of course two chemo treatments, with all of the associated challenges that goes with it. Although there are days that I am so distracted by the dis-ease and associated discomforts it is challenging to find any blessings, I have experienced enough Ah-Haaaas to begin my list. I trust this list will be helpful in reminding me to be more present and intentional once I am fully recovered.

Blessing #1: I am loved. I am loved by more people than I ever knew. Friends from all over the globe have reached out in a variety of ways to share their love, prayers, and support. In feeling the impact of receiving a card or a note in the mail, a lovely gift to amuse or comfort me, I will remember to do the same for others in the future since it is more than the gift that touches the recipient. It is love.

Blessing #2: I have deepened my awareness that it is possible to slip beneath the fear and discomfort of a situation to peaceful acceptance when physically and emotionally challenged. I have learned to resist what “is” increases the suffering. Becoming the observer of my experience puts me in a position to watch the unfolding, trusting there will be something good that will come of it. I will be stronger and wiser by riding the wave freely, remembering that I am not just a body, but a spiritual being. I am deepening my learning that I can trust all will be well again, even if at times I temporairily believe it may be hopeless.

Blessing #3: I have learned that when my energy improved and I was able to complete simple tasks such as doing the dishes, preparing a meal, coaching a client or being outdoors for a walk, my level of joy went off the charts. These common, everyday tasks and experiences that I would often take for granted when I was healthy became something to celebrate and enjoy fully. I learned that my level of presence and gratitude allowed joy to be more present than ever. This blessing can be life changing since there are always many things for which I can be grateful.

Tomorrow if my platelet count is adequate, I will return to the Cancer Center for Chemo #3 (the half-way point in treatment). That means I will be going down the road of the same physical challenges. This time around I will use the blessings and learning I have already received which I anticipate will get me over the rough spots with less suffering and a deeper knowing I will come out the other end even wiser.

Since none of us are ever complete with our learning, I trust even more blessings will become apparent and for that I will be grateful.

23 Comments »

  1. I am in SC right now. Your words are so wise and uplifting. Years ago I remember my mother quoting John Steinbeck from the book β€œTravels with Charley”. It was something to the effect that we only truly appreciate the spring because we have experienced the winter. Will be praying for your peace and comfort in this next round. Love, Mary

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    • Thanks, Mary! It is so true how we sometimes need to experience the absence of ​a privilege or even a simple experience to fully appreciate it. πŸ™‚

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  2. Two similar messages because I didn’t think it was allowing me to post from the email. I will get the hang of this. Just double the blessing, my friend.

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  3. Thinking of you this morning and pray the Chemo drugs are being kind to you this round. Stay strong and keep reminding yourself of the many blessings you have all around you. Halfway is a major milestone to cross, celebrate and reflect on how far you’ve come since the 1st day of diagnosis. You’re are such an inspiration! Love you Kate! Hope the sunshine is brightening your day today!

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    • Ahhh…thank you for checking in, Tami…Yes, I do feel as if I crossed a major line in the sand. I am also learning a lot about what my body needs and how to compensate. I am drinking more than I had in the past (which was more than normal with prior treatments). I have a feeling I will be needing a transfusion since my shortness of breath with even mild exertion persists. Extra fluid and blood should keep me out of trouble. Onward…I am learning a lot in this process and appreciate your presence in my life! Big HUG! ❀

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  4. Your indomitable spirit shines through your beautiful heartfelt words. Thank-you for sharing such wisdom . What an inspiration you are! Sending lots of love ❀️

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