I sometimes have extremely vivid and often meaningful dreams. Thankfully, Chemo has not killed off my ability to produce these entertaining and often educational mini dramas that occur while I sleep.

I recently had one of those dreams that caused me to continue to think about the message it provided once I awoke. My unconscious mind apparently wanted me to learn this lesson.

In my dream, three former friends that all shared a common bond of misunderstanding and subsequently mistakedly attacking me for imagined offenses, all showed up together with what I believe to be an intention to have me finally learn a lesson that has kept me from experiencing complete peace.

Since I believe there are sometimes negative people or even tyrants that show up in our lives from time to time that are meant to challenge us so we can be stretched into a new realm of self-understanding and even forgiveness, my three tyrants thankfully made a group showing in this dream with a message for me.

In the dream, each of them apologized for their attacks and misunderstandings of me and shared they were each acting out of fear. They also wanted me to see that in the big scheme of life, these three past incidents were actually quite petty. They pointed out that it really wasn’t worth my holding a grudge for their mis-treatment of me since in doing so, I was allowing them to stand in the way of my perfect peace and joy.

Although intellectually, I already knew this to be true and in fact, teach this principle in the workshops and trainings we do in Triumph Leadership Group, for some reason, this call to be Petty-Less went beyond my thinking mind to a deeper level of understanding.

When I woke up I felt cleaner and clearer. What used to be a concept that I could not fully apply to every situation in my life, was suddenly easy and obvious, as if a grey cloud in one tiny section of my mind, lifted. Allowing anyone or any situation to stand in the way of my experiening complete peace and even joy was insane and no matter what the reason may be, it is ultimately petty in comparison to my wellbeing.

Naturally, as this eureka moment of learning really sunk in, I began to look at all current challenges in my life as being petty, including the inconvenience of a breast cancer diagnosis and treatment. Although the diagnosis is serious, compared to my purpose for living, which is to live with joy, anything that gets in the way is always going to fall into the category of pettiness.

If I can catch myself sooner rather than later and remember I want to live a life of petty-lessness, I may very well save myself from a great deal of unnecessary suffering.

I realize this concept may bring up a sense of indignation in some readers since many life occurrences are far from what anyone would typically classify as petty. My call to clarify would be to ask yourself if the act of holding on to your anger and resentment, particularly since it will not change the past, is worth giving up your peace now. If it is, that is your choice. If not, perhaps seeing the offensive situation to be a senseless block to you feeling your best NOW may come under the classification of actually being petty.

So, the challenge I hereby give to myself is whenever I notice I am dwelling or even repeatedly thinking a thought that pulls me from joy is to ask myself if I really want to give my peace and joy away to whatever that offense may be.

I know regardless of any situation, the answer for me will always be NO.


  1. Thank you! I needed to read this. I will strive NOT to repeatedly think of thoughts that pull me from joy! This can be challenging in today’s world, but JOY would make the striving worth it! Keep posting, and I’ll keep praying for you!


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