Skip to content

Category: Uncategorized

Freedom and Vulnerability: Partners for a Joyful Life

Having cancer can feel like anything but freedom. . .that is if you only assess freedom by what your physical state or condition may be. My reference in this post is about experiencing the freedom to be authentically YOU during your experience of cancer and in life. In other words, it is about going through cancer and treatment YOUR way and setting yourself up to be free to be and do what works for you. Since many people have never experienced complete freedom in their normal day to day lives… Read more Freedom and Vulnerability: Partners for a Joyful Life

A Piece of My Mind

I have always known that the human mind has an innate ability to create a story or paint a picture of the past, present or future simply by thinking the same thoughts over and over. The tricky thing about this gift of the mind is the thoughts we each think do not have to be based on the truth. We humans can tend to tell ourselves scary stories that cause us to forget what we are truly made of and to even ignore facts so we can be fooled by… Read more A Piece of My Mind

Surrender

I find it ironic that having cancer has not disturbed me as much as losing my ability to function normally due to the side-effects of my Chemo treatments. Apparently, my fear of losing control is greater than the fear of losing my life. As I step back and watch myself navigate this journey, I can honestly say that I am not afraid to die. In fact, there have even been times such as during my hospitalization for kidney failure and severe dehydration after my first Chemo treatment that I seriously… Read more Surrender

Walking the Line

I’m realizing there is a fine line that I must walk on my Chemo/Cancer adventure. It is the line between vulnerability and strength. I squared off with both yesterday and learned a few lessons. Vulnerability: This is where I have no control. I am at the mercy to how the Chemo drugs will react in my body as well as how my body will respond. It seems that each round has brought some variation of some very uncomfortable side-effects so I am always curious to see what will happen. I… Read more Walking the Line

How I Spent My Vacation from the ICK of Chemo

Due to a special gift of an extra week in between Chemo treatments, on the heels of receiving two blood transfusions, I have felt the best I have since this adventure began in January. It has been such a treat that it feels as if I have had a vacation from Chemo, allowing me to enjoy the treats of life more than ever. It just so happens that today as I type this post I am at the Chemo Spa for my fifth treatment (one more to go). While I… Read more How I Spent My Vacation from the ICK of Chemo

The Elusivity of Desire

As a healthy person (pre-cancer and pre-chemo) desire made regular appearances in my life. For me, having desire was a healthy sign of being alive and engaged with the world. My desires gave me a feeling of being aligned with my purpose and provided me with something to dream about as well as guidance on where I could best spend my time and energy. Desire and energy have always been equal partners. One could not exist without the other. Sometimes desire showed up first, other times, energy led the way.… Read more The Elusivity of Desire

Givers and Receivers

At any given time over the course of our physical life times, we are in a position to either be of service to our fellow humans (giver), or in need of help from our fellow humans (receiver). When we are children we are total receivers, although we may provide love and joy to our caregivers, we are dependent on the loving kindness of those around us. If we are lucky, we are well taken care of and receive everything we need to grow up healthy and happy and eventually become… Read more Givers and Receivers

Surprise!

It is now Day 11 post Chemo #4 and although this round started out surprisingly easier than the others, it turned out to be one of the most challenging courses due to prolonged severe fatigue complicated by a low level of Magnesium. Since I spent a lot of time incapacitated and unable to accomplish anything of any physical importance, to amuse myself I focused on simply noticing the surprises I have experienced since my diagnosis and treatment. For my list I will begin at the beginning, a fitting place, it… Read more Surprise!