My hunger has been missing for five days now. I miss it. In my world, hunger is a sign of excellent health and vitality. It’s a sign that my body is functioning well and it is desiring nutrition to keep it going strong. Another reason I miss hunger is that enjoyment always followed when I satisfied it by eating whatever it might have been that I desired.
As with many things that occur when one is ill, we realize when it is missing how we took it for granted. Before chemo, my hunger and enjoyment of the foods that satisfied me were clearly not fully appreciated. I had endless options of foods to eat and never had to go hungry for very long since I always had an abundance of good things to eat available to me. Even if I was away from my pantry and fridge, I always had an energy bar in my purse for emergencies. I was covered. Hunger was not something to fear as it is for so many that don’t get to enjoy three meals a day. For me, it was simply something that was a sign of health.
Now that I am on this cancer learning adventure (other than my day of infusion) I have only felt hunger on two occasions and both were very brief. When they occurred I thought I was finished with my ickiness and turned the corner back to my normal. Unfortunately, I was wrong. Hunger’s appearances did not stimulate the usual response of enjoyment. One bite, one swallow and hunger was gone.
Since I have chosen to go through this breast cancer and treatment experience I also choose to come out the other end of it with some new insights and learning that can make my life even more fulfilling and enjoyable.
First on my list is I will appreciate hunger when it returns. I will thank it for being present and I will be even more grateful that I have a varity of foods at my disposal to satisfy it.